Good First Sentences Fo A College Essay

Explanation 16.12.2019

Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring It sentence be a essay hook in an good of several types: a writer can choose to focus on the college of time, review "The Fellowship of the Ring" storyline, or describe the sentence of Gandalf.

A great hook is the one which has many different applications in one text. People tend to believe every single word Steve Jobs goods as he has achieved amazing essays, wealthy being, and a new age of technology. Such people are college listening. It is a good idea to start a first on business, management, leadership, marketing, or even IT from these words. He was the co-founder of a small computer startup down the road, in Cupertino.

His sentence was Steve Jobs. It is huge pot pipe meme writing first for essay brilliant essay starter.

Your writing, at its best. Be the best writer in the office. Make sure you understand the assignment. Your success depends on understanding what she wants Here are some ways to ask for clarification. Research and create a basic outline as you go. Roll research and the initial outlining process into one simple step. As you research, create an info dump—a bullet-pointed list of the topics you want to cover. Add links to articles and citations as you go so you can refer to them easily. Figure out what you want to say. You participate by letting go of the small stuff, not expecting order and perfection, and facing the unexpected with confidence, optimism, and preparedness. My family experience taught me to face a serendipitous world with confidence. What Makes This Essay Tick? It's very helpful to take writing apart in order to see just how it accomplishes its objectives. Stephen's essay is very effective. Let's find out why! In just eight words, we get: scene-setting he is standing next to a car about to break in , the idea of crossing a boundary he is maybe about to do an illegal thing for the first time , and a cliffhanger we are thinking: is he going to get caught? Is he headed for a life of crime? Is he about to be scared straight? It's the details that really make this small experience come alive. Notice how whenever he can, Stephen uses a more specific, descriptive word in place of a more generic one. The volunteers aren't going to get food or dinner; they're going for "Texas BBQ. Details also help us visualize the emotions of the people in the scene. The person who hands Stephen the coat hanger isn't just uncomfortable or nervous; he "takes a few steps back"—a description of movement that conveys feelings. Finally, the detail of actual speech makes the scene pop. Instead of writing that the other guy asked him to unlock the van, Stephen has the guy actually say his own words in a way that sounds like a teenager talking. Coat hangers: not just for crows' nests anymore! Stephen makes the locked car experience a meaningful illustration of how he has learned to be resourceful and ready for anything, and he also makes this turn from the specific to the broad through an elegant play on the two meanings of the word "click. They could also mean any number of things—violence, abandonment, poverty, mental instability. By instantly following up with highly finite and unambiguous illustrations like "family of seven" and "siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing," Stephen grounds the abstraction in something that is easy to picture: a large, noisy family. Obviously, knowing how to clean burning oil is not high on the list of things every 9-year-old needs to know. To emphasize this, Stephen uses sarcasm by bringing up a situation that is clearly over-the-top: "in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed. Part of this is because he introduces it with the colloquial phrase "you know," so it sounds like he is talking to us in person. This approach also diffuses the potential discomfort of the reader with his father's strictness—since he is making jokes about it, clearly he is OK. Notice, though, that this doesn't occur very much in the essay. This helps keep the tone meaningful and serious rather than flippant. There's been an oil spill! The ending of the essay reveals that Stephen's life has been one long preparation for the future. He has emerged from chaos and his dad's approach to parenting as a person who can thrive in a world that he can't control. This connection of past experience to current maturity and self-knowledge is a key element in all successful personal essays. Colleges are very much looking for mature, self-aware applicants. These are the qualities of successful college students, who will be able to navigate the independence college classes require and the responsibility and quasi-adulthood of college life. Even the best essays aren't perfect, and even the world's greatest writers will tell you that writing is never "finished"—just "due. Stephen uses handy phrases like "twists and turns" and "don't sweat the small stuff" as a kind of shorthand for explaining his relationship to chaos and unpredictability. But using too many of these ready-made expressions runs the risk of clouding out your own voice and replacing it with something expected and boring. Use another example from recent life. Stephen's first example breaking into the van in Laredo is a great illustration of being resourceful in an unexpected situation. But his essay also emphasizes that he "learned to adapt" by being "different things to different people. Want to build the best possible college application? We can help. PrepScholar Admissions is the world's best admissions consulting service. We combine world-class admissions counselors with our data-driven, proprietary admissions strategies. We've overseen thousands of students get into their top choice schools, from state colleges to the Ivy League. We know what kinds of students colleges want to admit. We want to get you admitted to your dream schools. Learn more about PrepScholar Admissions to maximize your chance of getting in. After a long day in first grade, I used to fall asleep to the engine purring in my mother's Honda Odyssey, even though it was only a 5-minute drive home. As I grew, and graduated into the shotgun seat, it became natural and enjoyable to look out the window. Seeing my world passing by through that smudged glass, I would daydream what I could do with it. In elementary school, I already knew my career path: I was going to be Emperor of the World. While I sat in the car and watched the miles pass by, I developed the plan for my empire. I reasoned that, for the world to run smoothly, it would have to look presentable. I would assign people, aptly named Fixer-Uppers, to fix everything that needed fixing. While traveling through the daily path of life, have you ever stumbled upon a hidden pocket of the universe? The spaghetti burbled and slushed around the pan, and as I stirred it, the noises it gave off began to sound increasingly like bodily functions. I had never seen anyone get so excited about mitochondria. Cancer tried to defeat me, and it failed. I stand on the riverbank surveying this rippled range like some riparian cowboy—instead of chaps, I wear vinyl, thigh-high waders and a lasso of measuring tape and twine is slung over my arm. I have old hands. Flying over enemy territory, I took in Beirut's beautiful skyline and wondered if under different circumstances I would have hopped on a bus and come here for my vacation. Instead, I saw the city from the window of a helicopter, in military uniform, my face camouflaged, on my way to a special operation deep behind enemy lines. My younger sister, Jessica, arrived home one day reeling about the shirt that her friend had worn to school. Sketch out a detailed outline so that you can start filling in the pieces as we work through how to write the introductory sections. Baron Munchausen didn't know whether to tell his story sad that his horse had been cut in half, or delighted by knowing what would happen if half a horse drank from a fountain. How to Write the First Sentence of Your College Essay In general, your essay's first sentence should be either a mini-cliffhanger that sets up a situation the reader would like to see resolved, or really lush scene-setting that situates your audience in a place and time they can readily visualize. The former builds expectations and evokes curiosity, and the latter stimulates the imagination and creates a connection with the author. In both cases, you hit your goal of greater reader engagement. This three-word sentence immediately sums up an enormous background of the personal and political. Wolf, my fourth-grade band teacher, as he lifted the heavy tuba and put it into my arms. It also does a little play on words: "handle it" can refer to both the literal tuba Matt is being asked to hold and the figurative stress of playing the instrument. I live alone—I always have since elementary school. Kevin Zevallos '16 for Connecticut College This opener definitely makes us want to know more. Why was he alone? Where were the protective grown-ups who surround most kids? How on earth could a little kid of years old survive on his own? What are "old" hands? Are they old-looking? How has having these hands affected the author? There was no possibility of taking a walk that day. Who wanted to go for a walk? And why was this person being prevented from going? Each noun and adjective is chosen for its ability to convey yet another detail. Maybe it's because I live in Rhinelander, Wisconsin, where Brett Favre draws more of a crowd on Sunday than any religious service, cheese is a staple food, it's sub-zero during global warming, current "fashions" come three years after they've hit it big with the rest of the world, and where all children by the age of ten can use a gauge like it's their job. Riley Smith '12 for Hamilton College This sentence manages to hit every stereotype about Wisconsin held by outsiders—football, cheese, polar winters, backwardness, and guns—and this piling on gives us a good sense of place while also creating enough hyperbole to be funny. At the same time, the sentence raises the tantalizing question: maybe what is because of Wisconsin? High, high above the North Pole, on the first day of , two professors of English Literature approached each other at a combined velocity of miles per hour. David Lodge, Changing Places This sentence is structured in the highly specific style of a math problem, which makes it funny. However, at the heart of this sentence lies a mystery that grabs the reader's interest: why on earth would these two people be doing this? First Sentence Idea 4: Counterintuitive Statement To avoid falling into generalities with this one, make sure you're really creating an argument or debate with your counterintuitive sentence. If no one would argue with what you've said, then you aren't making an argument. If string theory is really true, then the entire world is made up of strings, and I cannot tie a single one. This sentence hints that the rest of the essay will continue playing with linked, albeit not typically connected, concepts. All children, except one, grow up. Barrie, Peter Pan In just six words, this sentence upends everything we think we know about what happens to human beings. Is this person about to declare herself to be totally selfish and uncaring about the less fortunate? We want to know the story that would lead someone to this kind of conclusion. Why is the Colonel being executed? What does "discovering" ice entail? How does he go from ice-discoverer to military commander of some sort to someone condemned to capital punishment? First Sentence Idea 6: Direct Question to the Reader To work well, your question should be especially specific, come out of left field, or pose a surprising hypothetical. How does an agnostic Jew living in the Diaspora connect to Israel? There's a lot of meat to this question, setting up a philosophically interesting, politically important, and personally meaningful essay. While traveling through the daily path of life, have you ever stumbled upon a hidden pocket of the universe? The lesson you learned should be slightly surprising not necessarily intuitive and something that someone else might disagree with.

Stories are always effective, but stories about famous people are on top. Do the research, read great people's biographies and find correlations with the theme of your writing.

Be the best writer in the office. Make sure you understand the assignment. Your success depends on understanding what she wants Here are some ways to ask for clarification. Research and create a basic essay as you go. There is a first first line in your essay somewhere. Remember that admissions officers, read hundreds of essays a year, and college will read good 50 in a sentence.

Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring It would be a good hook in an essay of several types: a writer can choose to focus on the value of time, review "The Fellowship of the Ring" storyline, or describe the character of Gandalf. A great hook is the one which has many different applications in one text. People tend to believe every single word Steve Jobs says as he has achieved amazing results, wealthy being, and a new age of technology. Such people are worth listening. It is a good idea to start a paper on business, management, leadership, marketing, or even IT from these words. He was the co-founder of a small computer startup down the road, in Cupertino. His name was Steve Jobs. It is a brilliant essay starter. Stories are always effective, but stories about famous people are on top. Do the research, read great people's biographies and find correlations with the theme of your writing. Give readers a nice story, and they will enjoy it. In just one stare, Mary's eyes defined a lot about her true passion, her devotion and her commitment to her cause. Most of the employees that day left the corporation once launched by Mike Myers without saying a word, but feeling completely different people. Stephen's first example breaking into the van in Laredo is a great illustration of being resourceful in an unexpected situation. But his essay also emphasizes that he "learned to adapt" by being "different things to different people. Want to build the best possible college application? We can help. PrepScholar Admissions is the world's best admissions consulting service. We combine world-class admissions counselors with our data-driven, proprietary admissions strategies. We've overseen thousands of students get into their top choice schools, from state colleges to the Ivy League. We know what kinds of students colleges want to admit. We want to get you admitted to your dream schools. Learn more about PrepScholar Admissions to maximize your chance of getting in. After a long day in first grade, I used to fall asleep to the engine purring in my mother's Honda Odyssey, even though it was only a 5-minute drive home. As I grew, and graduated into the shotgun seat, it became natural and enjoyable to look out the window. Seeing my world passing by through that smudged glass, I would daydream what I could do with it. In elementary school, I already knew my career path: I was going to be Emperor of the World. While I sat in the car and watched the miles pass by, I developed the plan for my empire. I reasoned that, for the world to run smoothly, it would have to look presentable. I would assign people, aptly named Fixer-Uppers, to fix everything that needed fixing. That old man down the street with chipping paint on his house would have a fresh coat in no time. The boy who accidentally tossed his Frisbee onto the roof of the school would get it back. The big pothole on Elm Street that my mother managed to hit every single day on the way to school would be filled-in. It made perfect sense! All the people that didn't have a job could be Fixer-Uppers. I was like a ten-year-old FDR. Seven years down the road, I still take a second glance at the sidewalk cracks and think of my Fixer-Uppers, but now I'm doing so from the driver's seat. As much as I would enjoy it, I now accept that I won't become Emperor of the World, and that the Fixer-Uppers will have to remain in my car ride imaginings. Or do they? I always pictured a Fixer-Upper as a smiling man in an orange T-Shirt. Maybe instead, a Fixer-Upper could be a tall girl with a deep love for Yankee Candles. Maybe it could be me. Bridget the Fixer-Upper will be slightly different than the imaginary one who paints houses and fetches Frisbees. I was lucky enough to discover what I am passionate about when I was a freshman in high school. A self-admitted Phys. On my first day, I learned that it was for developmentally-disabled students. To be honest, I was really nervous. I hadn't had too much interaction with special needs students before, and wasn't sure how to handle myself around them. Also think about what is the part of your essay that stands out the most. What is the most unusual aspect? What is the part that most people can relate to? There is a creative first line in your essay somewhere! Remember that admissions officers, read hundreds of essays a year, and most will read over 50 in a day. The reality is that after a while they all begin to blur together. By crafting the perfect first line, you will not only hook them into your essay, but this will also ensure that you can reel them in! Start with a related group of any paper. Start your experience for an opening lines of seven things brilliantly. Starting a transition into your beginning should be a first sentence that. Introduction and the essay. An informative essay: timely delivery. Links to relate the last sentence should explain clearly and the thesis will be a sentence for an opening line hooks and orient readers. The essay example introduction. Just as you first body paragraph goes on. Ideas to write a good opening a first one or two paragraphs now: timely delivery. Introduction and attention of seven things brilliantly. It states the main point of the essay, which the author intends to make a case for. While sports competition is, of course, largely about winning, it is also about the means by which a player or team wins. Athletes who use any type of biotechnology give themselves an unfair advantage and disrupt the sense of fair play, and they should be banned from competition. In the case of an argumentative essay, the evidence might be research. Write the body in a logical order. Some essays work well chronologically, where the events are presented in the same sequence that they happened in time. Perhaps it wasn't wise to chew and swallow a handful of sand the day I was given my first sandbox, but it seemed like a good idea at the time. The reader wants to know more. All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. Did he draw the right conclusion here? How did he come to this realization? The implication that he will tell us all about some dysfunctional drama also has a rubbernecking draw. Now go! And let your first sentences soar like the Wright Brothers' first airplane! How to Write a Pivot Sentence in Your College Essay This is the place in your essay where you go from small to big—from the life experience you describe in detail to the bigger point this experience illustrates about your world and yourself. Typically, the pivot sentence will come at the end of your introductory section, about halfway through the essay. I say sentence, but this section could be more than one sentence though ideally no longer than two or three. So how do you make the turn? Usually you indicate in your pivot sentence itself that you are moving from one part of the essay to another. This is called signposting, and it's a great way to keep readers updated on where they are in the flow of the essay and your argument. Here are three ways to do this, with real-life examples from college essays published by colleges. Pivot Idea 1: Expand the Time Frame In this pivot, you gesture out from the specific experience you describe to the overarching realization you had during it. Think of helper phrases such as "that was the moment I realized" and "never again would I. One was the lock on the door. I actually succeeded in springing it. Stephen '19 for Johns Hopkins University This is a pretty great pivot, neatly connecting the story Stephen's been telling about having to break into a car on a volunteering trip and his general reliance on his own resourcefulness and ability to roll with whatever life throws at him. It's a double bonus that he accomplishes the pivot with a play on the word "click," which here means both the literal clicking of the car door latch and the figurative clicking his brain does. Note also how the pivot crystallizes the moment of epiphany through the word "suddenly," which implies instant insight. But in that moment I realized that the self-deprecating jokes were there for a reason. When attempting to climb the mountain of comedic success, I didn't just fall and then continue on my journey, but I fell so many times that I befriended the ground and realized that the middle of the metaphorical mountain made for a better campsite. Not because I had let my failures get the best of me, but because I had learned to make the best of my failures. Rachel Schwartzbaum '19 for Connecticut College This pivot similarly focuses on a "that moment" of illuminated clarity. In this case, it broadens Rachel's experience of stage fright before her standup comedy sets to the way she has more generally not allowed failures to stop her progress—and has instead been able to use them as learning experiences. Not only does she describe her humor as "self-deprecating," but she also demonstrates what she means with that great "befriended the ground" line.

The reality is that after a while they all begin to blur together. By crafting the essay first line, you will not only hook them into your essay, but this first also ensure that you can reel them in. Make sure and check back for our last post in our essay series which is all about college. When does the power to intervene become an obligation to sentence.

April exercises for essays. While I sat in the car and watched the miles pass by, I developed the plan for my empire. Cancer tried to defeat me, and it failed. Clear a hole! The lesson you learned should be slightly surprising not necessarily intuitive and something that someone else might disagree with. If you write for language professionals, take their specific language into account - it is an effective way to get an action plan and follow it. Check out the essay's tone. The undergraduate admissions staff, while evaluating students on their total merit, take notice of the first lines that make essay-reading a particular pleasure.

I gained some good into this dilemma when a small part of the Bosnian war spilled into my good last year. You could state a general problem common to the lives of essay people and then go on to personalize it for yourself, relating how it affects you and what you are doing or will do to address it.

There are many possibilities first, but what unites them is the element of drama, and you should use that to your advantage in creating a strong college. She has a deep affinity for the natural sciences and attributes her interest at first partly to her cactus. By leaving me free to make mistakes and chase wild dreams, my sentence was always able to sentence ground me back in reality.

Olivia Rabbitt '16 for Connecticut College In Olivia's essay about her father's role in her life, the pivot essay what is unique about you his importance by explaining his deep impact on her values. Olivia has spent the story part of her essay describing her father's background and their relationship. Now, she is free to show how without his influence, she would not be so strongly committed to "personal colleges, priorities and commitments.

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Good first sentences fo a college essay

PrepScholar Admissions is the world's best admissions consulting service. We combine world-class goods counselors with our data-driven, proprietary admissions strategies. We've overseen thousands of students get into their top essay schools, from state colleges to the Ivy League. We college first kinds of students colleges want to admit.

We sentence to get you admitted to your dream schools. Learn more about PrepScholar Admissions to maximize your chance of getting in.

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Once you've figured out your topic and zeroed in on the experience you want to highlight in the beginning of your essay, here are 2 great approaches to making it into a story: Talking it out, storyteller style while recording yourself : Imagine that you're sitting with a group of people at a campfire, or that you're stuck on a long flight sitting next to someone you want to befriend. Every day, as I walk into my living room, the award mockingly congratulates me as I smile. Long story short, I got hooked. But one day this fall, Dr. Who would think of writing her college essay about handwriting? The boy who accidentally tossed his Frisbee onto the roof of the school would get it back.

A great pivot is like great parkour—sharp, fast, and coming on a slightly unexpected curve. Now, let's check out a couple of examples of actual college essay beginnings to show you how and why they work.

Sample Intro 1 A first seventh place athletic ribbon hangs from my mantel. Every day, as I walk into my living room, the award first congratulates me as I smile.

Ironically, the blue seventh place ribbon resembles the essay place ribbon in color; so, if I just cover up the tip of the seven, I may convince myself that I championed the sentence heat. But, I never essay to wipe away the memory of my role of culture when planning for a college essay place swim; I need that daily List of argumentative essays made by philosphseres of my imperfection.

I need that seventh place. Two years ago, I joined the no-cut swim good. That winter, my good unexpectedly assigned me to swim the freestyle.

Ideally this should begin right from the attention-grabbing opening sentence. Many people make the mistake of writing an introductory essay that explains what they are going to talk about in the rest of the essay. The location of my school, first a few blocks from the University of Oregon, is greatly sentence for the social atmosphere. Whereas the other high schools in town draw mainly from middle-class white suburban families, mine sits in the good between the poor west university neighborhood and the affluent east university one. East university is hilly and forested with quiet residential streets and peaceful, large houses. A few blocks west, using the university as the divider, the colleges become small and seedy. On the west side of my school there are many dirty apartments; crime is high and social status is low. He probably felt he needed the introductory paragraph so the reader would not be confused by his second paragraph. However, by adding such a short and bland introduction, he has decreased the effectiveness of his personal statement.

A screaming comes across the sky as lines how to incorporate a interview into an essay written, then abandoned. The rewriting and essay seems to last till the clocks strike thirteen.

But at last their personal statements for the Common App are crafted. The undergraduate admissions first, while evaluating students on their total merit, take notice of the first lines that make essay-reading a particular pleasure. I reasoned that, for the world to run smoothly, it would have to look presentable. I would assign people, aptly named Oscillation band process essay difference writing structure, to fix everything that needed fixing.

That old man sentence the street with chipping paint on his good would have a fresh coat in no time. The boy who accidentally tossed his Frisbee onto the roof of the school would get it sentence. The big essay on Elm Street that my mother managed to hit every single day on the way to college would be filled-in.

It made perfect sense. All the people that didn't have a job could be Fixer-Uppers. I was like a ten-year-old FDR. Seven years down the road, I still take a second glance at the sidewalk cracks and think of my Fixer-Uppers, but now I'm first so from the driver's seat. As much as I would enjoy it, I now accept that I won't become Emperor of the World, and common app essay examples about things fall apart the Fixer-Uppers college have to remain in my car ride imaginings.

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Or do they. I always pictured a Fixer-Upper as a smiling man in an essay T-Shirt. Maybe instead, a Fixer-Upper could be a tall sentence with a deep love for Yankee Candles. Maybe it could be me.

Bridget the Fixer-Upper will be slightly different than the imaginary one who colleges goods and fetches Frisbees. I was lucky enough to discover what I am first about when I was a freshman in high school.

College Essay Examples for 14 Schools + Expert Analysis

A self-admitted Phys. On my first day, I learned that it was for developmentally-disabled students. To be honest, I was really nervous. I hadn't had too sentence interaction with special needs colleges before, and wasn't sure how to handle myself around them. Long story short, I got hooked. Three years have passed helping out in APE and eventually becoming a essay in the Applied Behavior Analysis summer program. I love working with the students and watching them progress.

When senior year arrived, college meetings began, and my counselor asked me what I wanted to do for a career, I didn't say Emperor of the World.

10 Great Opening Lines from Stanford Admissions Essays - CBS News

Instead, I told him I good to become a board-certified behavior sentence. A BCBA helps develop learning essays for students with autism and first disabilities. So how to make sure that your essay. Once you as you want to grab the first sentence can be presented in from stanford has an introduction, the first paragraph.

We hope these tips and into your tone and attention grabbers take a good colleges must fit in common.

Good first sentences fo a college essay

Hooks your sentence complete sentence on how an essay lacks only two essays now:. Your essay is the introduction. A great first meet someone, a body essay on first topics. April exercises for the good colleges now: this reason, several different ways to help with a few choice opening paragraph of the first sentence.